(no subject)

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

The Iron Bull followed the Inquisitor and her companions through eluvians, chasing down the Viddasala and her men. He fought, he defended, he assisted in every matter the Inquisitor included him in, and even some that she didn't. Something heavy settled in him as they entered a familiar room. As far as they all knew, nothing had changed. Even Dorian had no idea.

Hissrad was good.

Why did that make him feel slightly sick now?

"Dragon's Breath is... an actual dragon?"

The heavy weights guarding the dragon noticed them. Bull squared himself and he heard the Viddasala's voice before he looked at her. She didn't need to speak to give the order, but she did.

"Hissrad, now! Vinek kathas!"

He turned toward the rest of the party and drew his great sword. "Understood, ma'am. Change of plans. Nothing personal, bas."

He kept his gaze on the Inquisitor's face. He couldn't look at Dorian, would not. Instead he charged the Inquisitor; only the full weight of Cassandra's countermeasure knocked him off course. But he had been alive and fighting longer than most of them. He grabbed the Seeker's shield and used it to fling her away from him as the rest of the Viddasala's men fell on the party.

Comments

[propertool]

Uncertainty flooded in as Dorian stumbled to a stop in front of Bull. He could hear the liquid filling his lungs, somewhere in that one word. Dorian's hands shook, and he wrenched them forward, sending the shards of bloodied ice further into Bull's chest.

He hadn't been thinking. He hadn't meant suffering. Dorian was livid, but this was necessary for his own safety. Suffering wasn't. Nothing personal, bas.

Dorian fell against the wall of ice. He clawed at it, feeling hysterical.

"I was tired, too! I was frightened, too!"

The suggestion hid in the tremble of the words, tight and holding back all of Dorian's grief and surprise. Bull didn't have to do this. He needn't have. Everyone knew he was hurting, they would have cared for him through it.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull grit his teeth when the ice sank deeper. He was pretty sure it was coming out of his back now.

Then Dorian was there in front of him, clawing at the ice like he could undo what had been done. There was probably a way to save him; Bull had seen the Inquisitor revive people. But that couldn't happen here. Dorian knew it. Maybe that made it worse.

"Hey," he murmured. Bull kept one hand braced against the ice, holding his weight as much as the ice itself. His other hand, bloody by now, gently touched Dorian's cheek. "Hey, it's okay. You had to."

He wanted to take the pain away from Dorian, take it with him, wherever he was going. The Qun had given him what he needed to survive the loss of the Chargers, but it had also led to this. It never felt like a choice.

"It's okay."

[propertool]

"I know. I know I had to."

It came out as a sob, but Dorian had conviction. It was the only path that either of the could have taken at that point. But that hardly made it okay.

Yet he wanted to feel comforted by that voice, even when it was bubbling as his lungs filled with his own blood.

With a last effort, Dorian stood back and gave a sharp wave of his arm. The spikes of ice through Bull's chest receded and crumbled, leaving Bull's wounds open to bleed. Dorian had hit two of his major arteries, on purpose and on instinct. Bull wouldn't last long once the ice wasn't holding his chest together anymore.

That was purposeful. There was no need to make him suffer. Dorian had never felt that need, not when he'd been betrayed by his father, not by Alexius, and not by Bull.

"It's pointless, you know. It's all for naught, all of this. Your people can't win this, not in the long-term. You've got to know that?"

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

He dropped to the ground as soon as the ice was gone. He lay there for a moment, trying to hold on. His vision was dim around the edges. It was instinct to try to cover his wounds, but there was nothing to be had for it. Dorian used his magic with deadly purpose, and Bull could not begrudge him.

"I know," he answered. "She's wrong." No one would hear him above the sounds of battle. No one but Dorian. He had to hear it. Hissrad breathed. In, out. Shok ebasit hissrad.

"You have to stop her. The triumvirate--" Bull closed his eye. He was trying too hard. He was dying. "Kadan."

[propertool]

"I will," Dorian swore to him. He wanted to approach, to hold him as he went, but what would that achieve? Bull would still die, Dorian would still be left without him, forever.

He hazarded a look toward the fight in the distance. The Inquisitor was working on freeing the dragon. It swept its tail, taking out three of the qunari and Varric in the process. Fire and green light flashed. Dorian cursed.

"You won't last long. Should I go?"

It was up to Bull. Dorian could at least do him the service of making one last choice for himself.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"Stay."

Hissrad never asked anything for himself. But he asked for this now. The Iron Bull asked for this, from Dorian, who owed him nothing. It felt selfish.

But he didn't want to die alone.

He wanted to push up. He wanted to sit up, so he could hold Dorian, if he would allow it. But if he moved, it would be over. It was almost over.

Meraad astaarit, meraad itwasit, aban aqun. Maraas shokra.

"Please."

[propertool]

"Alright," Dorian said. And then, louder, "Alright."

He raised a fist into the air. With a loud flash and crackle, purple light glimmering in his eyes, he forced a wide round static barrier around them, enough to repel any stray magic, or any stray qunari, which may try to wander close to them. He was certain his comarades wouldn't come near. They would know better.

Dorian ell to his knees by Bull then, gathering him up as well as he could, though he was already laying in a pool of his own dark blood. And, Maker, did qunari always have that much blood in them? Did a body always have that much blood?

He pulled one of Bull's shoulders onto his lap. He forced a smile onto his face.

"Look at me. I loved you, that was real and true. Just go knowing that. And please -- just -- be at peace. Leave this shite behind and be at peace. I expect to see you again, on the other side."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

He could feel the crackle of magic across his skin as Dorian cast the spell. At least they would have privacy, if only for a moment. It would only take a moment.

Bull moved as much as he could, helping when Dorian pulled on his shoulder. He leaned against him; he was tired, and he was getting cold.

He had a big body. There was a lot of blood.

Look at me.

He forced his eye to focus on Dorian's face. "I loved you," he answered softly. "I wasn't supposed to. I defied the Qun in doing that. I do not regret it."

He wasn't sure that he expected that confession to mean much to someone that had never lived under it, someone who could never quite understand what it meant to live in service to it. But he hoped Dorian had even an inkling.

Hissrad - Bull - closed his eye. He let go of his wound and touched Dorian's hand, covered it with his.

"Live," he murmured.

[propertool]

"I loved you, too. And I don't regret it."

Dorian's smile, though wan and sad, ticked up at the corner. If anyone could understand, he thought, maybe this man could. Dorian had never wanted to trust his love to anyone, not ever again. But he had, and it was worth it, because now he could try again. Some day. The hurt, it wasn't too much to bear. Just nearly.

"I will. I'm going to kill that woman, and I am going to get out of here. And then I am going to see to it that the Inquisitor makes it out of this alive after all. And then, I am going to live a very long life at home, until I'm grey and fat."

He felt something slip away. He felt the weight of Bull on his lap start to change. It was frightening, but he needed to be there for it. He deserved to feel it.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"They're going to want my body."

It wouldn't be his anymore, he wouldn't be in it, and the rest of the Inquisition would be angry. Even if the Inquisitor intervened, there would be angry people that would like to see him - or parts of him anyway, stuck on a pike. He didn't know what would happen. He just wanted Dorian to be ready.

He couldn't lift his head anymore, and everything in him felt heavy and far away. "Kadan," he breathed. He forced himself to focus on Dorian's face. If that was the last thing he saw before he left this world, it would be worth it.

He couldn't apologize for what he'd done. He wouldn't. Some part of him needed to believe that the Qun had demanded it - even this. His betrayal on both sides.

Asit tal-eb. Shok ebasit hissra.

Bull's body had always been heavy, but in death that weight felt final. He lay there against Dorian until the last breath left him. Then it was only a body, too cold and too still against Dorian's lap.