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[shok_ebasit_hissra]

It was late when he texted Dorian, just to warn the mage that he was on his way home. He'd promised he would; some nights it wasn't an issue, but Bull just had a feeling when he left the Bramford earlier. He hadn't been wrong, apparently. He took the elevator, even if he didn't trust it, because he'd taken a bad blow to his left leg and the idea of walking up all the stairs proved more daunting.

He leaned on the wall as he went down the hall and let himself into his apartment. He liked that Dorian spent the night; he liked that Dorian spent the night even when Bull had to work. It would be just as easy for Dorian to get an undisturbed night of sleep in his own apartment, but he was always there. Bull liked seeing him, asleep and relaxed and somehow taking up three quarters of the massive bed.

Bull landed on the bed more heavily than he meant to and he hissed, teeth grit against the pain. He breathed through it; it wasn't the worst pain he'd ever had. He was annoyed that it had slowed him up at all. Bull leaned down to work the brace loose, to take it off so he could remove his boots, at last. He might not bother changing for bed.

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[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"You are very Tevinter in a lot of ways," he insisted. "And in others... not. Your penchant for embracing change, for one. Even if you complain about it loudly to make up for your acceptance." Bull smiled and tenderly rubbed Dorian's neck.

The huge rack commented startled a louder laugh out of him and Bull tried to quiet himself down. He didn't want to wake the neighbors.

"Why did you come in the first place? I know you were a little drunk, but you had to have been thinking about it before that if that's where your mind went as soon as you let it."

[propertool]

"You mean aside from the fact that you were, despite being Qunari and honestly having a bit of a gas problem, the hugest, most rugged man I have ever had the pleasure of walking behind for miles?"

Dorian adjusted himself beside Bull so they could better meet eyes. His own shone in the darkened room.

"I wasn't sure we could do it. Or if we did, I wasn't sure we would all live through it. And I wanted ... before it was all over, I wanted to be with someone. It was never a fling for me. I wanted to be able to say I'd had someone of my own before I died."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Dorian's eyes were beautiful, even in the dark room. Bull held him, stared up at him like he was enthralled.

"Having anything of my own never meant much before I had the Chargers." But he'd been part of a group like that before, in the Bleeders and on Seheron before that. Dorian was different.

"And then I met you, kadan. I thought you'd be a fling," he admitted. Bull had been interested, but he didn't expect that Dorian would stay interested after his curiosity had been satisfied. He'd taken a small gamble. Bull brushed his fingertips along Dorian's cheek, following the cut of the bone beneath soft, well-cared-for skin. "I teased you about coming back, but then you did, like you owned the place."

Bull had been thrilled, and he had spent considerable energy hiding that, had spent a lot of time thinking about what that meant for him, as a Qunari, as Ben-Hassrath. But in the end, he'd been happy with Dorian. Whatever time they spent together, no matter where they'd been, he'd been happy. Even with all the demons and Venatori.

[propertool]

"I fell in love with you. The moment I admitted it to myself, my ancestors were rolling in their graves. Which honestly, just turned me on even more. There may be something wrong with me."

Dorian smiled, so broadly that it hurt. Because he did love Bull. They'd both taken a shot in the dark, and they'd somehow, blindly fumbling, managed not to bung it all up in the end.

"And for the record, I had more things in your room than you did by the end of the month. I practically did own the place."

He held a finger up to Bull and then leaned over the side of the bed to dig into the pocket of his trousers, which were folded neatly on the nightstand on his side.

Dorian pulled out a fancily embroidered little pouch.

"I could?"

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull knew Dorian came from a different place, one in which he'd become Tal-Vashoth. He didn't want to think about where he had come from: a place where he'd fallen in love with Dorian, and was painfully aware of his loyalty to the Qun. His fear of the day when those two things might clash.

Then he'd come to Darrow. Maybe it was a reprieve. Dorian's smile erased the anguish that threatened to bubble up and Bull drank in the sight of him. He was only distracted by the bag; he looked at it. "Could what? Are we back to you coming into my dreams?"

[propertool]

"Literally and figuratively, if possible, yes. You have to admit you're curious. I heard you gabbing with Solas way back when about his admittedly kind of creepy habit of just Fadewalking every spare moment."

Dorian looked at Bull very seriously for a moment.

"You might even remember it all on waking. You already know you're in the Fade when you're dreaming, Bull. Wouldn't you like some company for once?"

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"You know I've been afraid of being possessed by a demon since childhood, right?" In his memory, Dorian had been out in the field with them when Cole revealed that gem of a memory.

There was something tempting, he couldn't deny that. The idea of having Dorian in his dreams, the hope that they would be pleasant. He wondered if Dorian was aware of his bad dreams, even on the nights he slept quietly.

[propertool]

"The Fade reflects your emotional state. There won't be any demons, if I can make you feel good. A demon is one thing, but are you so frightened of a spirit of Love? Pleasure? Devotion?" All were things Dorian felt toward Bull. All were things he believed Bull returned.

"One of these days we're going to have a good, long talk about that fear of yours. But not tonight. Maker knows neither of us want to taint the mood that way."

He kissed Bull, in a way he hoped got across how much it would mean to him. There was an entire half of Dorian's life that was totally peripheral to Bull almost all of the time. The Fade was Dorian's Qun, in a way.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"You said there was a nightmare somewhere," he said, sounding a bit uncertain. Those spirits all sounded nice, and he thought of Cole, ostensibly a spirit of compassion. Bull also knew what lived in his own mind, never mind what lurked in the Fade beyond it. He didn't want to taint this.

He kept his eye open during the kiss, holding Dorian close. When they parted again, he stroked back Dorian's hair, studying his face. It was impossible not to see how badly he wanted this. Bull hadn't been raised to trust magic the way Dorian did. But, eventually, he nodded.

"We can try," he said. "I don't know how to control my dreams... I do have nightmares." He wasn't trying to talk Dorian out of it. He just wanted to... warn him, or something.

[propertool]

"I do. You don't get to be a full Enchanter without knowing your way around a demon. And being smart and strong enough to take it out of the equation."

He wasn't exactly some naive Ferelden brat not very bright up top, just waiting for the Templars to decide he deserved Tranquility.

"I will be as gentle as I can. I will stop the moment you ask me to, or the moment anything seems out of the ordinary."

It was the usual promise. And Dorian meant it.

Dorian took the bottle of water he kept by the bed off the nightstand and, carefully, trickled the very smallest amount of the powder in the pouch into it. It swirled through the liquid, quickly turning it a deceptively pretty glowing blue.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull had been in the Fade bodily once, but going there in his dreams was different. But he trusted Dorian; he trusted him with his life on the battlefield. How was this any different?

"What do I do?" he asked while Dorian poured some of the lyrium into the water. He'd never had lyrium, never really been near it before coming to the south.

[propertool]

"Just chug it. Don't be a princess about it.' Dorian held the bottle toward Bull.

"A little more than half. You're bigger than I am, and you're not a mage. That means more of it. Don't worry about any ill effects, the Templars have issues because they take huge amounts of the stuff at extremely frequent intervals. Which is insane, by the way. I don't envy Cullen."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"Wait, why do I have to have lyrium? Dorian..." Bull frowned a bit, looking more hesitant even as he took the bottle. He stared at it, a little unnerved by the glow. Maybe it wasn't any different than drinking a healing potion but he still didn't--

This was new. This was edging along a deep-rooted fear. Bull wasn't necessarily good at confronting those. He stared at Dorian for a long moment, then sighed and took a long swig from the bottle. A little more than half.

[propertool]

"Trust me for a moment. I trust you."

It wasn't an accusation, simply coaching. A reminder. Dorian drank his half smoothly, and wrinkled his nose a little preciously at the taste, despite being familiar.

Too much like metal and maple syrup. Dorian hated maple syrup.

"Now, just go to bed. Relax. Can I do anything to help you along?"

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"That heat-thing again on my knee," he said as he sank back down, trying not to linger on the worst that could happen. Bull didn't want to taint this experience with his anxieties around the Fade. He did trust Dorian. He'd just never done anything like this before. Ever.

[propertool]

"The lyrium may actually help. Cullen tells me it fills you with a sense of inward peace and supreme confidence. Pity it doesn't do the same for me."

Dorian gave a snort of breath through flared nostrils, but didn't mention what it did for him. Suffice to say, too much of the stuff was very bad for a mage, though just a bit was very good.

He lay his hands on Bull's knee underneath the blanket. It was more careful than usual, the result of making sure only so much proverbial water came out sluice gates which were suddenly much wider.

He kissed Bull on the ear, and settled in to relax himself.

"Sleep tight, amatus. See you in your dreams."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Between the gentle heat seeping through his knee and the effects of the lyrium - after a brief, silent panic wondering if it would effect Qunari physiology differently - Bull managed to drift off. He was tired; it had been a long night.

At least the dream started easy enough. A warm beach with a breeze off the water to keep the humidity at bay. It carried scents of flowers that grew around Par Vollen, but also of honeysuckle and lotus flowers.

[propertool]

It was not long before Dorian found his way to Bull. They were literally on top of one another in bed, so naturally, their realms were most adjacent.

He didn't recognize the scene at first, so it was very difficult to try not to put any undue influence on it yet. Dorian didn't know what he was looking at to reinforce it, even when he realized, Oh. It must be Par Vollen.

The scent of spices followed the realization. Dorian was too happy to have made it there to bother trying to stop it.

And there he was. Looking out across the water without the longing of daytime memory. When Bull turned, Dorian was taken aback for a moment, though why he should be he didn't know.

Bull had his other eye here.

"Oh, good. Glad you're here." Dorian beamed at him, and opened his arms.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"Where else would I be?" Bull smiled, looking at Dorian. He didn't wear a brace here, either; his fingers were all whole as he cradled Dorian's face, holding him still for a light kiss. When he broke it, he touched their foreheads together, a gentle headbutt.

Bull's memory - his dream - of Par Vollen were touched by other memories, things he'd like from other places. The scent of spice didn't throw him off too badly. He liked that, too.

[propertool]

Dorian wrapped his arms around Bull's shoulders and gave a silvery laugh. He pulled him into a hug. Dorian was dressed only in an ornately filigreed white lounge robe, and a pair of silky underthings. He'd remembered the robe from home, and he'd remembered the silky underthings because Bull had a thing for them.

"Do you want to stay here?" Here would be comfortable, after all.

"You're gorgeous on the beach when it's not cold and overcast with constant rain."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

"I don't know, you looked pretty good on the Storm Coast, even if you were complaining about it the whole time." Bull enjoyed the slide of the robe against his skin, the warmth of Dorian beneath it not at all concealed.

He looked up when Dorian asked if he wanted to stay and he looked at the coast line. "Where else would we go?"

[propertool]

"Literally anywhere you could imagine. We could go to the public baths in Minrathous. The library in Asariel. We could go back to the Exalted Plains and have sex directly on the ruins that have very specific signage about not being on the ruins."

Dorian got a better hold of Bull's neck and used it to pull himself up, and straddle his waist. He loved to do it, but so often Bull's knee precluded it.

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull adjusted his hold on Dorian as the mage climbed him. It wasn't hard to hold him; it never really was. Here, it was even easier. "Somehow I think the Exalted Plains idea is... vaguely offensive," he said with a quiet laugh.

"Minrathous doesn't sound like a bad idea."

[propertool]

Dorian wanted to point out that Dorian was vaguely offensive, but was too enamored with the idea of bringing Bull home, even for just a while. Even if it was only an empty facsimile.

He kissed Bull again, dotting his face with warm, brief pecks, before he dropped from his arms and took Bull by the hand. He tugged him along behind, pulling him in a gentle coaxing toward the short waves of the warm northern seas.

Once Dorian stepped out onto the water, as if by magic, the space under his feet became a floating step of black jet stone. It was followed by another, and another, appearing as if by faith, until eventually the scene before them began to change and melt into something entirely different.

It was the public baths, the largest and most famous in the entirety of Tevinter. The architecture soared above their heads, and the water in the baths smelled like minerals, and bergamot and rose petals, which floated on top of the gently steaming water.

Dorian told himself not to think of how Bull would never have been allowed into them.

"I thought about the gardens at the Proving Grounds, but this seemed much more relaxing."

[shok_ebasit_hissra]

Bull closed his eyes under Dorian's sweet kisses, basking in them. When he opened his eyes again it was o see the jet stone Dorian created as he moved. He followed him, not unnerved as the landscape around them changed. It was a dream, and it was pleasant.

The scent hit him first, before he lifted his head to look at the architecture all around them. He squeezed Dorian's hand.

"Mm, having a public bath all to ourselves? There is something to be said for that," he said as he leaned in to kiss Dorian's neck.